Trailer War (2012)

trailerwarWTFNo war is to be fought with Trailer War. We all win.

After all, it begins with “a death wish at 120 decibels” and ends with a woman’s disembodied head being chased by a fleet of radio-controlled helicopters. Anyone who chalks up such cathode-ray shenanigans as a loss shouldn’t be watching anyway.

Curated by Lars Nilsen and Zack Carlson of the venerable Alamo Drafthouse (and Carlson of the seminal yet criminally out-of-print Destroy All Movies!!! tome), Trailer War could be nothing more than a feature-length assemblage/assault of vintage coming attractions, if “nothing more” didn’t carry a connotation of being substandard. Containing zero overlap with 2009’s Drafthouse-branded fifth volume in Synapse Films’ 42nd Street Forever trailer-compilation series, this War is waged only against the same ol’ clips you’ve seen dozens of times before. More often than not, if the films represented aren’t obscurities, their previews are. Who else is going to run the promo for Maniac Cop 2 … in French?

trailerwar1Among the goods are such bads and uglies as:
• “that big man” Joe Don Baker, sweating through the kung-fu adventure of 1974’s Golden Needles;
Argoman the Fantastic Superman, a 1967 superhero acid trip more slam-bang entertaining than any entry in the so-called Marvel Cinematic Universe;
• 1976’s Shoot, a killer-hunter thriller presented per the narrator as being “in the great tradition of American violence”;
Mr. No Legs, a 1979 fight flick that looks kind of like Walking Tall if the hero couldn’t, y’know, walk tall, small or at all.
• 1973’s The Mad Adventures of “Rabbi” Jacob, apparently a Jewsploitation slice of slapstick from France;
• 1972’s giallo-esque Amuck, for which sapphic sex becomes the not-MPAA-approved selling point; and
• Ryan O’Neal and John Hurt as Partners, Paramount Pictures’ homophobic mainstream comedy from 1982. The trailer even uses the F-word, and I don’t mean “fuck.”

From Voyage of the Rock Aliens to Nudes on Tiger Reef, this party-ready Trailer War is a start-to-finish victory for aficionados of drive-in, grindhouse, outré and/or VHS fare — in other words, you, prized Flick Attack reader. I could watch such hyperbolic treasures for hours upon hours; here, we have to “settle” for two. —Rod Lott

Get it at Amazon.

Blackout (1978)

blackoutTime and time again, the movies prove that drivers for any given state’s Department of Corrections are the worst. Fifteen years before the best example of this — The Fugitive’s “bus, meet train” incident — Blackout boasted an utterly avoidable crash of the DoC’s prisoner-transport wagon, thereby loosing a few hardened criminals onto the Big Apple’s darkened streets.

Inspired by NYC’s real-life citywide blackout of July 13, 1977, this Canadian-made thriller largely confines itself to an apartment high rise, in which the felons — led by a deceptively clean-cut Robert Carradine (Revenge of the Nerds) — go floor to floor, robbing, raping and setting fire to priceless Picassos during the 12-hour electricity outage. And only an out-of-shape, off-duty cop played by Jim Mitchum (Monstroid) can stop them!

blackout1Even before the crime spree begins, a lot is going on within the building: for starters, a Greek wedding, an African-American birth, a man on life support and Ray Milland gritting his teeth in yet another of his late-career Angry Old Man roles (see: Frogs). Meanwhile, over at utilities provider Con Edison, cigar-chomping technicians scream at a primitive, wall-sized city grid as if they are jammed in the friggin’ middle of The Taking of Pelham One Two Three.

They’re not — and I’m being kind by including the ’98 made-for-TV version starring Edward James Olmos in that apples-to-crabapples comparison. The dormant Blackout is not unwatchable; it’s just a wasted opportunity, as director Eddy Matalon (Cathy’s Curse) overall fails to take advantage of the possibilities offered by his unique setting. The exception is the parking-garage chase between Mitchum and Carradine, but that’s the film’s next-to-last scene — a little too late to start figuring things out. —Rod Lott

Get it at Amazon.

Cry_Wolf (2005)

crywolfWhile the hero of Cry_Wolf runs for his life roughly halfway through the movie, he passes his school’s cafeteria menu board touting the dish of the day: “TOASTED CHEESE.” It’s the perfect summation of the film itself: well-done junk.

Newly transferred to Westlake Preparatory Academy, British high school student Owen (Julian Morris, Donkey Punch) is befriended immediately by cute redhead Dodger (Lindy Booth, 2004’s Dawn of the Dead), who invites him to join her bored, rich, mostly deplorable friends to play a “lying game.” Owen’s victory and a recent unsolved homicide in the nearby woods sparks a bigger idea in Dodger: Convince the student body that the murderer is a prep-school serial killer who has made his way to Westlake and is just getting started. The budding lovebirds concoct an entire backstory and outfit (orange ski mask, camo jacket, hunting knife) for “The Wolf,” and let one mass email do the rest.

crywolf1Anyone can guess where Cry_Wolf goes from there, in part because director Jeff Wadlow (Kick-Ass 2) flat-out shows you, flashing-forward with quick clips of students encountering The Wolf — scenes which play out in full an hour later. That baffling choice defuses some of the suspense … but not all, as Wadlow and fellow scribe Beau Bauman (who later co-wrote 2007’s Prey) planted twist after twist after twist. That’s not to say all of the curves pay off; the exposition-packed final scene in particular collapses under its own weight.

Cry_Wolf came too late in the teen-slasher cycle beget by Wes Craven’s Scream a decade earlier to make a mark, yet it’s a better effort than most of the imitators. That includes 1998’s Urban Legend, which Cry_Wolf resembles in theme. Wadlow’s work is now dated, with quaint plotlines reliant upon the Nokia 3300 mobile phone, AOL Instant Messenger and Jon Bon Jovi. —Rod Lott

Get it at Amazon.

Reading Material: 5 Books to Dive into This June

unbuttoningamericaLike fellow best-sellers-turned-films Catch-22 and The Stepford Wives, Peyton Place has entered pop culture in a way that its title has become a household term whose definition is known even to those who haven’t consumed the source material. Grace Metalious’ 1956 novel, however, is the only one to ignite an all-out scandal for its frankness of postwar life in the U.S.: one marked by sex, rape, murder and more sex. What it did — and undid — is chronicled by Ardis Cameron in Unbuttoning America: A Biography of Peyton Place. “To read Peyton Place today is to ponder the sexual quicksand on which women (and men) walked,” Cameron writes, and while she does touch on the Oscar-nominated movie, the long-running TV series and the multitude of sequels, the focus is on Metalious book and its role in bringing suburbia’s secrets out from under the well-Hoovered rugs and ushering in feminism’s second wave. A decade in the making that draws upon decades of letters and other documents, Cameron’s Cornell University Press hardcover release is the best kind of history lesson: shocking, entertaining, enlightening, vital.

classichorrorlitSo writes Ron Backer in the introduction to his latest book from McFarland, Classic Horror Films and the Literature That Inspired Them, “I was surprised to learn how many classic horror films were based on works of literature. Who knew?” Um … everyone? I’ll cut the guy some slack, though, because the end result is a pretty enjoyable work of quasi-encyclopedic film studies, examining the “true symbiotic relationship in experiencing the same tale of horror in two different forms of art.” To that end, Backer covers 43 novels and short stories, and 62 subsequent movies across 40 thorough, judiciously illustrated chapters. From Universal to Hammer, your usual monstrous suspects are here, but to his credit, he also scopes out some obscurities, including Clements Ripley’s Black Moon, William Sloane’s The Edge of Running Water and Jessie Douglas Kerruish’s The Undying Monster. On the more contemporary side, he finishes with two early works by one Stephen King.

arthannibalOne would guess that learning the secrets behind the gruesome special effects of Hannibal would make the show less freaky. Nope! If anything, Jesse McLean’s The Art and Making of Hannibal: The Television Series just makes it creepier. Seeing such freak-of-the-week stuff like the neck cello, corpse totem and the bee man (oh, Lord, not the trypophobic bee man!) up-close is entirely unsettling when it’s staring you in the face in four colors and large spreads vs. fleeting across the cathode rays of a mainstream-network show. Titan Books releases a slew of these behind-the-scenes volumes with a production quality closer to the coffee table than the “collector’s” fan magazine of yesteryear, but few seem to merit such curtain-peek treatment; Hannibal, however, is a series that actually deserves this treatment. Its top-class ghastliness is matched by intelligent scripts, crisp direction and delicious performances; McLean’s sleekly designed trade paperback mirrors the series’ credibility.

supernaturalGDTMy hot-and-cold reaction to the subject of The Supernatural Cinema of Guillermo del Toro: Critical Essays can be summed up by the opening and closing lines of actor Doug Jones’ foreword: “Guillermo del Toro. A name that makes film fans buckle at the knee in reverence. … The man to whom I will forever be grateful for allowing me name to be associated with his in some of the most respected films in the history of cinema.” Geez, get a room! Del Toro is a serious talent, but he can do wrong; for starters, his running times show he doesn’t know how to quit while he’s ahead. And yet, I enjoyed reading about films I’m not particularly fond of in this John W. Morehead-edited collection from McFarland. It dives into issues of religious symbolism, childhood trauma, insect obsession and other recurring themes in movies great (Pan’s Labyrinth), good (Blade II), bad (Hellboy II: The Golden Army) and, um, Pacific Rim.

woodyallenR2RSelect films of Woody Allen can exude so much neuroses to make the unaccustomed viewer cringe in discomfort. No scene, however, matches the awkwardness of a section within Woody Allen: Reel to Real, in which author Alex Sheremet exchanges emails with esteemed film critic Jonathan Rosenbaum over the latter’s negative remarks of Allen’s work in the past; it soon devolves into a war of words. “Wait,” you ask, “why is such a thing even included in a book?” Easy: Because Reel to Real is not a conventional text, but Take2 Publishing’s inaugural “DigiDialogue” experiment. In short, that’s a fancy term for “ebook,” but one that Sheremet vows will be updated periodically — not just as Allen makes new pictures (roughly one every year), but as readers converse with the author and one another on the films covered and opinions shared, as if an Internet forum were built-in. While the comments are not yet incredibly in depth in number (per the March 31 review copy I read), this undoubtedly will grow and be interesting for hardcore Allen fans to follow. Even without this feature, Sheremet’s insights on the films make for intelligent criticism; his chronologically arranged essays grow in length as Allen moves from “the early, funny ones” to “sitting at the grown-ups’ table.” Join the discourse! —Rod Lott

Get them at Amazon.

Guest List: Eric Red’s Top 5 Truck Movies

whiteknuckleEric Red, author of the new truck-thriller novel White Knuckle, has written such vehicular-minded movies as Near Dark, The Hitcher and Cohen and Tate (the last of which he also directed). Now he takes the wheel of Flick Attack’s first-ever Guest List!

Big rigs, the tractor-trailer 18-wheelers we see rolling along the American highways, belong in movies. There’s something bigger-than-life about the huge, rumbling, mythic diesels driven by those modern day cowboys, The Men Behind the Wheel. It was a lifelong fascination with these giant trucks and the colorful world of truckers that inspired my new high-octane thriller novel, White Knuckle, a mystery tale about an FBI agent on a cross-country hunt for a prolific serial killer/interstate truck driver. It’s surprising more films aren’t made about the epic world of the long hauler, but several truck movies have delivered on the exciting cinematic dimensions of big rigs. Here are my personal top-five favorites:

Continue reading Guest List: Eric Red’s Top 5 Truck Movies

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