All posts by Louis Fowler

Deep Crimson (1996)

The salacious true crime story of the Lonely Hearts Killers in the 1940s was dramatized in the down-and-dirty flick The Honeymoon Killers, with Shirley Stoler and Tony Lo Bianco. (Surely, you’ve seen the far-out promotional images for that 1970 movie, right?)

Even though Killers was a slight precursor to John Waters’ comic misanthropy, it took director Arturo Ripstein — one of Mexico’s premier filmmakers — to really give it a sensational retelling in 1996’s dark and dour Deep Crimson, not to be mistaken for Deep Red, Crimson Peak or the pornographic Deep Peaks.

In 1940s Mexico, slightly overweight nurse Coral (the brilliant Regina Orozco) leads an extremely unhappy life. She not only is a single mother of two young kids, but has monstrously bad breath. Her only sexual outlet is to feel up her comatose and disabled patients, and she’s obsessed with actor Charles Boyer, an obsession that plays to her disembodied fantasies of leading a full life.

On the other side of town, Coral meets a man named Nicolás (a swarthy Daniel Giménez Cacho). He’s dangerously slick, well-toupéed and, of course, also seriously lovelorn. After a brief meeting and a slice of cake, they make passionate love and fall head over heels in love. So, what do they do next?

They send her kids to the orphanage, then immediately find a drunken woman to kill with rat poison. After dumping the stranger at a train station, they continue their murderous streak, conning elderly women and taking out their liver-spotted bodies Their worst act is an old-time home abortion that cumulates in the bathtub drowning death of a 4-year-old.

This being 1940s Mexico, justice is appropriately dealt. Cut to credits.

Having seen only a few of Ripstein’s genre films — the severely spooky La Tía Alejandra being the creepiest — I found the impact of the couple’s crimes, combined with the damaged psychology of the mother, makes Deep Crimson a truly engaging movie, especially for Orozco, whose performance always rides the tenuous line between depressive love to maniacal woe. Turning subversive love and perverse longing into a real necessity, Deep Crimson is a dry, dusty tale told through the perceptive lens of the sterile Mexican desert. Ripstein tears apart the Lonely Hearts Killers’ story and rebuilds it the way should have been done right from the beginning. —Louis Fowler

Get it at Amazon.

Under the Cherry Moon (1986)

WTF

In between 1984’s utterly transcendent Purple Rain and 1990’s much-maligned Graffiti Bridge, Under the Cherry Moon is the 1986 outlier that Prince fans forgot. That being said, I’ve always thought it’s the better Prince movie. Its soundtrack is a brilliant companion piece I often play as well. Does anyone agree with me? Anyone?

In the glam retaliation of the French Riviera at an unspecified time, Christopher Tracy (Prince) is a stylish piano player at a swanky nightclub. He and his ambiguous partner/roommate, Tricky (mirror master Jerome Benton), are high-priced gigolos, methodically preying on the wealthy women of the lavish coast while homoerotically playing in their shared bathtub.

Either way, while crashing a party, they meet spoiled socialite and spicy ingenue Mary (Kristin Scott Thomas) in her birthday suit. Spasmodically, they play the drums at her coming-out party. True to form, Christopher gives her the searing eye while she does the cha-cha and kicks him out of the party but

As their relationship forms, it becomes a constant battle of wills and wiles, barbs and beauty, will they or why they shouldn’t, with him calling her a “cabbage head” in a paralyzing sneak attack of words.

They fall in tragic love that’s more chaste than expected, filled with more dirty talk than actual realized sex, giving more pomp (pump?) than penetrative circumstance. In a weird way, Cherry Moon is a truly romantic film that only become more endearing with its taut strangeness.

The soundtrack is one of my favorite albums, one where the grooves are about to be blown out from constant play. The same thing can be said for the actual movie, where Prince’s style and grace are fully encapsulated in a funky 100 minutes.

After the movie bombed, Prince made one more film (the aforementioned Graffiti Bridge), but it was too late; he was culturally dead until he was actually dead. But, in my opinion, Under the Cherry Moon is his pinnacle in a career of high points, dramatic and otherwise, and should be re-evaluated.  —Louis Fowler

Get it at Amazon.

Xanadu (1980)

WTF

In the mid-’80s, I had (have?) a huge crush on Olivia Newton-John, thanks to obsessive repeat HBO airings of 1983’s Two of a Kind. Even though I’d never seen her other films like Grease or, well, Grease, I got a Sears-supplied, clearance single of “Twist of Fate” from the movie I routinely staged intricate dances to when no one was looking.

“Sex Shooter” singer Vanity took ONJ’s sex-symbol throne in HBO’s The Last Dragon era, but I never forgot Olivia. (Or Vanity.) Once I had my own Blockbuster card in the early ’90s, I rented a sun-bleached VHS copy of Xanadu and all these hormone-driven feelings came back to the forefront, this time with an ELO soundtrack!

Xanadu came recommended by one of those somewhat prolific “bad movie” books that took up so space on my shelf. It was described as a “turkey” to comedically scorn and anthemically balk at. As the VHS played, I thought, “Sure, it’s a little corny … but what ’80s musical isn’t?

I mean, this film has everything, including a post-The Warriors/pre-Megaforce Michael Beck, a duet with New Wave band The Tubes, an animated sequence from Don Bluth, glitzed-out dancing machine Gene Kelly and, in a most virginal wardrobe choice, ONJ and her sisters — mythological muses, of course — dancing off a mural in the street and into my dreams.

Really, that’s the best entertainment for the likes of me. I can see now why everyone thought I was gay. I wasn’t.

Even if the Xanadu movie isn’t your cup of bleach, the Xanadu soundtrack is a truly stellar find. Half ONJ, half Electric Light Orchestra, these worlds collide on the singles “Magic” and “All Over the World,” as well as the title cut — a total banger. It’s pure pop perfection that can be found in the discount bin!

Rewatching Xanadu all these years later on Kino Lorber’s Blu-ray keeps the late ONJ on my schoolboy crushes list, but now it’s more for the stylish grace, playful demeanor and wistful wiles that takes me back to a time where a musical can still be magical for the right person.

And that person is me. —Louis Fowler

Get it at Amazon.

The Jerky Boys (1995)

Even though I might lose credibility, I liked the 1990s comedy team of the Jerky Boys. Crafting a whole mythology that seduced young men with their Howard Stern-era humor, the duo (Johnny B. and Kamal, to the educated) and their prank calls were actually pretty funny when my younger brother played their tapes for me on the way to school.

Complete with their “Hey, jerky!” salutation, we amateurishly taped our own calls from friends’ bedrooms, dialing in to a momentary glimpse of cult stardom we thought we could have, too.

I recall our enthusiasm at the promo screening for The Jerky Boys movie at Oklahoma City’s Penn Square 8 in 1995, where copies of the soundtrack CD (featuring Collective Soul’s minor alt-radio hit “Gel”) were handed out.

But the movie was, in a word, terrible. I realized the Boys’ careers were done, and so was my fandom. These jerks had no more yuks to give. I gave my brother the soundtrack.

Yet 30 years later, my Amazon Prime menu has practically begged me to stream The Jerky Boys, pleading on its scabby knees. After a month, I could no longer resist.

Now, while it’s not the worst cinema of the ’90s as many claim, The Jerky Boys is definitely one of the laziest comedies I’ve ever seen. It even makes hemorrhoids jokes in the first few frames. Johnny B. and Kamal play two unemployed good-for-nothings in Queens. As you might have guessed, they make prank phone calls that are truly scatological in tone and volume.

While trying to look for a job, they create the character of Frank Rizzo, a mob enforcer who fucks with half of the cast of The Sopranos, to great comedic effect. Of course, this gets them in trouble with real mafioso Alan Arkin — let that settle a bit — who orders a hit on them.

In the 81-minute running time, the boys mimic anal sex in a public bathroom, Tom Jones performs “Are You Gonna Go My Way,” Paul Bartel discusses “piss clams” with Kamal’s “Egyptian Magician,” and Ozzy Osbourne manages alt-rockers Helmet. As you probably expected, the climax finds the boys pranking President Bill Clinton.

Oh, to be alive again!

In the hands of The Stoned Age (another of my brother’s favorite films) director James Melkonian, The Jerky Boys was too much, too soon, and he never directed again. Did he kill himself?

While I’ll always snort when I hear the phrases “silly ass,” “milky licker” and “lamby nipple chops,” the movie is so episodic that, if it were made today, it’d be a prestige-format limited series on Netflix and get canceled halfway though, prompting a re-evaluation on TikTok, leading a renaissance of prank calls.

Or maybe The Jerky Boys will be lost to time. —Louis Fowler

Get it at Amazon.

Eat the Rich (1987)

Comedically prescient as all get out, Eat the Rich is all about class warfare, rampant snobbery, low-class politics and, of course, the most sarcastic form of cannibalistic fine dining.

And I would have known about all these stiff-upper-lipped British themes, discussions and subtle comedy before now, if only my VCR worked the way it was supposed to in the early ’90s. Those were the days, when KOBC Channel 34, Oklahoma City’s UHF television station, broadcast religious programming in the morning, Western reruns in the afternoon and low-rent syndicated shows during prime time. When normal broadcasting went bye-bye around 11 p.m., KOBC became the best non-cable station around.

From Z-grade horror and UK sex comedies to rarely seen campy treasures from all around the world, you never knew what you were in for, and I was here for it … but it was past my bedtime. So I used my parents’ VCR to tape dozens of films off KOBC, with 1-900 sexy singles’ lines ads, Time-Life’s Mysteries of the Unexplained shills and Channel 34’s own sad weather reports.

Eat the Rich was one of those tapes, except the VCR only recorded the first five minutes before skipping to the 6 a.m. farm report. Never were cattle futures so sad! Even in the era of Blu-ray special editions, this British satire was impossible to locate until I found it on Amazon Prime. Even better, it was only $3.99 to rent. God save the Queen and her fascist regime!

Featuring bit-part players of England’s alt-comedy faction the Comic Strip and, even better, music from Motörhead, it’s off to a ripping start, well past the originally allotted five minutes. In the posh restaurant Bastards, the abusive patrons dine on cheetahs, koala and pandas.

After a row with a blowhard patron, put-upon waiter Alex (Lanah Pellay) is having not anymore, shouting, “Oi! Where’s my fuckin’ tip?” He’s thrown out by staff and, through a series of blows to his ego and his superego, becomes a leader of a group of nonmilitary anarchists who want to, undoubtably, eat the rich.

Concurrently, former boxer Nosher Powell is a faux politician, a lager-swilling lout who gets all the racist football fans in his corner because he brokers deals with his ill temper and his uncompromising fists. (Sounds like the politicians in Oklahoma — right, Markwayne?) As you can imagine, all these punked-up parties and fucked-up parts end up riotously dead, with arms dealer Lemmy coming out top. And why wouldn’t he?

Though the film was a massive flop on a grand scale, it’s still a Comic Strip Presents movie, giving the well-to-do British society two fingers way up. It’s directed by Peter Richardson, with alternative-comedy regulars such as Nigel Planer, Rik Mayall and Adrian Edmondson in brash cameos. But Eat the Rich is comedian and cabaret singer Pellay’s show as Alex, with every line dripping in sarcastic wherewithal and venomous barbs that made me guffaw in all-knowing titters. Pellay is a true revelation, 30 years too late.

It took me three decades to find, watch and embrace this, but Eat the Rich is a properly digested and classically disposed comedy that needs to be rewatched, reassessed and, true to the movie, regurgitated. —Louis Fowler

Get it at Amazon.