Recall, if you will, how difficult it was to sit through a Police Academy movie in theaters.
Now imagine sitting through all seven of them in a row at home.
Yet this test of he-man resilience is exactly what Louis Fowler and I subjected ourselves to on a sunny Saturday in spring. The idea was simple: Would we be able to watch all 612 minutes — that’s 10.2 hours — of painfully simple slapstick and belabored set pieces? And could we do it without cracking? And just how much Steve Guttenberg can one man take?
Being someone who hasn’t played video games regularly since the heyday of the Atari 2600, I have zero to little knowledge of the 
In other words, TBV3D — as its fan base would call it, if the film were good enough to merit one — is less a futuristic fighting action piece and more just a piece. Of poop, that is. I suppose that’s okay if you’re expecting a giggly rom-com set in the halls of a learning institution. But then it should be titled Tekken: Giggle School 3D, no?
Ultimately, as an effects-heavy action-adventure, that doesn’t matter. That Russell still harbors nice-guy charisma and Emmy Rossum sports wet cleavage through the whole thing helps even more. It even has bite, with one person in particular meeting a gruesome death worthy of a slasher flick. Like Paul Gallico’s 
Had star Erika Christensen actually gone all the way and bared her considerable assets, 
Wait, so what’s the problem here? I’m thinking back to when I was in high school. And if someone as cute and curvy as Christensen wanted to have sex with me and it meant she would show up at my house to look at old pictures with my mom or instant-message me while I was doing homework, so be it. ’Tis a very small price to pay for hot, chlorinated sex.