All posts by Rod Lott

Drive (1997)

If released today, Drive could pass for Rush Hour 4. Coming a couple of years before the Jackie Chan/Chris Tucker smash, Drive is Rush Hour’s prototype, but with far better martial arts and someone who knows how to direct them.

A baby-faced Mark Dacascos stars as a karate expert who comes from Hong Kong to the United States. He’s been implanted with super-soldier technology that he wants to keep out of Communist China’s hands, and he’s headed for Los Angeles to sell the goods for a cool $5 million. As happens with such things, he’s followed by a gaggle of goons with an arsenal of automatic weapons. To escape from them and the police early in the film, he takes a hostage in a bar, a down-on-his-luck Kadeem Hardison (from TV’s A Different World), who serves as his reluctant partner and comic foil.

Together, they go on the run toward L.A., encountering trouble all along the way, as well as some unsolicited help from a horny motel employee (Brittany Murphy), then with her layers of baby fat and doing her caffeinated/ADD/retard thing.

Drive is so much fun that not even Hardison or Murphy — neither a reliable presence — can kill it. Directed by Steve Wang (The Guyver, Kung-Fu Rascals), this is one of those rare occasions where all the creative elements (some known for not having much creativity) simply click.

Dacascos is completely impressive, demonstrating some damned fast kung-fu moves. On the basis of this, I’m surprised his profile isn’t higher. Although strictly an American film, this has some of the most exciting and innovative martial-arts sequences you’ll see, from an assault in a tiny motel room to the climactic showdown in a space-themed bar. It’s fast, funny and full of both great little moments and big action payoffs. —Rod Lott

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Land of the Dead (2005)

Having given birth to the modern zombie genre with Night of the Living Dead, George A. Romero further explored the terrain in several sequels, including the fourth entry, Land of the Dead. So different are the films that he can never be accused of making the same movie twice; but this time, the result just isn’t all that good.

Working with a huge-for-him budget and some name actors, Land had every opportunity to be the “zombie masterpiece” as the ads touted. From the very first shot — a sly visual gag of a pointing diner sign reading “EATS” — you think Romero may very well pull it off. But then the camera slowly pans over to some kind of zombie oompha band. If we’re going to fault George Lucas for the Wookie’s Tarzan yell in Revenge of the Sith, we’ve gotta take Romero to task for this, too.

A thin story emerges: In one major metropolitan area, survivors live in a well-fortressed downtown area surrounded by rivers, barbed wire, electric fences and armed guards to keep the undead out. The rich among them live in a palatial skyscraper filled with fine dining, shopping and housing, all owned by the wealthy Dennis Hopper. He’s hired armies to roam the streets for the sole purpose of killing zombies.

Meanwhile, Gas Station Attendant Zombie has somehow learned to become smarter and corrals a whole mess of zombies to follow him to the gated community for some late-night snacks. Zombies attacking a skyscraper. That should be an awesome movie (and it was, almost, in Demons 2). But rather than deliver that, Romero would rather get preachy and political. Screw messages! Me want zombies! —Rod Lott

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Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events (2004)

You know how people (maybe even you) go apeshit over the Harry Potter movies? I don’t get it. That’s not to say it’s wrong — just not for me. When it comes to children’s-oriented fantasy, the vastly underrated Lemony Snicket movie is more my taste, and no one could be more surprised about that than me, because this adaptation looked like typical Jim Carrey crap.

Instead, it’s anything but. An admirably restrained Carrey plays the balding, fiendish Count Olaf, a would-be actor who lives in a spooky castle and becomes the legal guardian of three young children (a jailbait Emily Browning among them) distantly related to him, recently orphaned by a house fire. Olaf is no Super Nanny, but he’s eager to get his hands on their immense inheritance. But the kids escape, bouncing from one obscure relative to the next, with Olaf on their tail and sporting different disguises.

The chase isn’t as interesting as the film’s Tim Burton-esque bleakness and pervading sense of dark humor, both welcome elements to what could have been sheer kiddie junk (as the rather sly opening parodies, with a crudely animated “The Littlest Elf” cartoon). And I’d wager that the closing credits may be the most amazing cinema has ever seen.

Too bad this tanked, because I would’ve loved to see the sequels. That’s rather, er, unfortunate. *rimshot* —Rod Lott

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Bunny Lake Is Missing (1965)

The title says it all: Bunny Lake Is Missing! But we’ll fill you in anyway.

Having just moved to a new neighborhood in London, single mom Ann Lake (Carol Lynley) becomes alarmed when she goes to pick up her little girl, Bunny, at school, and the tot is nowhere to be found. Not only that, but no one at the school remembers ever seeing her. And not only that, but they think Ann to be somewhat of a loon.

And not only that, but the authorities — led by Newhouse (Laurence Olivier — pardon me, Sir Laurence Olivier) — think about giving up on the search, because there’s no evidence Bunny ever existed. Or at least none that Ann and her brother, Steven (Keir Dullea of 2001), can present, as Bunny’s personal items at their apartment have vanished.

Director Otto Preminger deliberately toys with the viewer, making you question whether Ann is telling the truth or off her rocker. (It doesn’t help that Preminger cleverly has a cuckoo clock sound off in the background a couple of times — a clue or a joke?) And does that creepy bastard of a landlord (Noel Coward) have anything to do with it?

Although it could stand to lose a couple of scenes that go nowhere, this is a tight, black-and-white thriller with an awfully bizarro final act that’ll have you wondering if you weren’t drugged. It holds up pretty well today, minus the repeated songs of The Zombies. —Rod Lott

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Shock-O-Rama (2005)

I’ve never been able to stomach more than a minute of ei Independent Cinema’s softcore efforts, like Spider-Babe, The Lord of the G-Strings, Kinky Kong and Play-Mate of the Apes. Not being 13 years old, I don’t see the appeal. Surprise then, to see one that’s actually kinda clever, at least by their low standards: Shock-O-Rama.

It helps that it’s interested in a lot more than simulated lesbian sex scenes. Writer/director Brett Piper (perhaps most notable for They Bite) pays loving tribute to horror anthologies in a joyful, drive-in style. It’s like asking, “What if Grindhouse were made for $7.49? Plus tax?”

In the wraparound, Misty Mundae practically plays herself: a Z-grade movie actress. She’s fired by her producers, who then have to screen other films to find a new starlet to fill her void. Cue the stories, one involving aliens in a junkyard; the other, skanks undergoing a scientific experiment (that’s where most of the T&A lay, FYI).

The wraparound becomes a story in itself as Mundae resurrects — and then is pursued by — a zombie. The proceedings never take themselves seriously, which is wise considering the bar for acting is set pretty low. Piper pulls off some good effects, too, on an apparent Big Lots! budget. —Rod Lott

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