Unequivocally, Party Line is the finest psycho thriller starring a prematurely balding, former Tiger Beat staple in eye makeup and a puffy shirt. That would be Leif Garrett (Macon County Line) as Seth, the whiny, wealthy brother of sexy, spoiled Angelina (Greta Blackburn, Savage Harbor). They have nothing better to do than repeatedly carry out a felonious, three-part scheme as if it were as frivolous as Taco Tuesday: They set up dates by dialing up party lines (the Tinder of their day); Angelina seduces them; then Seth straight-razors them before driving off in a sports car with the license plate “TEMT ME.”
Following a number of these acts of 976-evil, homicide detective Lt. Dan Bridges (Richard Hatch, TV’s Battlestar Galactica) is assigned the case. But because he’s a “dangerous, hotheaded jackass” who exercises both police brutality and illegal search-and-seizure, he’s assigned a buttoned-blouse partner (Shawn Weatherly, Amityville 1992: It’s About Time), a special investigator for the district attorney’s office, to keep tabs on him.
They eventually get a break thanks to a preteen girl (Patricia Patts, the voice of Peppermint Patty in several Peanuts cartoons) who calls the line for kicks. This babysitter has more bearing on the plot — and thus, more screen time — than Bridges’ captain, played by the iconic Richard Roundtree (Shaft, duh).
Seth harbors major mommy issues and sissy issues — the latter best exemplified by his rage-tearing the curtains off the rod as he watches a tanning Angelina rub her bikinied breasts. In this scene and all, Garrett’s performance is hysterical, in both the emotional and humorous definitions of the word.
As clearly as Seth is disturbed, Party Line is clearly a theatrical progenitor — although a weak one — of the ’90s VHS/cable erotic thriller revolution. Director William Webb (The Banker) lathers a prescient Animal Instincts coat of adults’ body paint atop his coupling of William Castle’s I Saw What You Did and Brian De Palma’s Dressed to Kill. You don’t even need the Blu-ray subtitles’ many instances of “(sexy saxophone music)” to recognize that.
Too hokey to be erotic or thrilling, Party Line boasts several pause-worthy moments (and I don’t mean the kind you think*). For instance, be sure to see:
* 37:30 for a cameo by the boom mike, moving more than either actor in the scene
* 41:18 to glimpse the fucking filthy bare feet of Bridges’ cop girlfriend (Marty Dudek, Martial Law), as if she’s not been pulling over speeders, but cleaning chimneys with Dick Van Dyke
* 1:01:33 for one of the era’s more brazen kid mullets (speaking of, Garrett’s hair suggests an odd combo of mullet, ‘fro and failed Rogaine)
Yes, of course “The party’s over” is one of the film’s final lines. —Rod Lott
*That said, gentlemen, check out 1:12:48 for Weatherly in a red satin dress more fiery than the 15-oz. “Party-Size!” bag of Flamin’ Hot Cheetos.