Producer Roger Corman’s Deathsport has long been pegged as a semi-sequel to Death Race 2000, but don’t you believe it. Although it reunites Corman with star David Carradine; has “death” in its title; and involves one effed-up sport of the not-too-distant future, it has nothing to do with that 1975 film, which is a satirical riot.
Even with Claudia Jennings dancing naked in a room strewn with Christmas lights, this one is boring. At least for the first 30 minutes, in which peaceniks on horses are zapped into oblivion by the bad guys. And hey, check out the so-called “mutants,” with ping-pong-ball eyes. Carradine and Jennings both find themselves held captive by Richard Lynch, in a cell bathed in depressing red light.
But then the games begin, and Deathsport kicks into higher gear, as our two heroes are given swords and forced to participate in a gladiatorial-style showdown wherein they’re pursued by souped-up-with-welded-metal motorcycles that make the same cartoony sound each and every time they swoop by.
Then it’s a chase for the remaining running time of a short, sweet 82 minutes. Hope you like motorcycles, fighting with torches, and some dumb-ass with blond hair who struggles to remember his lines. Bonus: woozy cycle-cam during obstacle course finale! —Rod Lott
Coinciding is the arrival of a busload (literally, a busload!) of teenagers in their swimsuits, shaking their tailfeathers to the groovy tunes of the Bobby Fuller Four, who experience seizure-like jerks as they perform. A MILFy Nancy Sinatra is among the bunch, and she belts out a number of her own. There’s a plant among the teens in the form — and oh, what a form! — of Quinn O’Hara as Sinestra, a curvy, busty, nearsighted redhead who plots to kill one of the young men on the hunt for the treasure. What is it about attempted murder that makes for lighthearted comedy?
Being American, you may ask, “WTF is a Lordi?” Apparently, it’s a heavy metal band in which its members dress in demonic costumes. (Think GWAR, minus the name recognition.) They’re hiding out in the hospital to kill off the humans, one by one, growling all the way.