Self Driver (2024)

Surrounded by the detritus of ever-accumulating fast-food wrappers, rideshare driver D — just D, thanks — might be the saddest bastard of all the freelance motorists on the Vrmr app. He’s behind on rent and utilities, and has a new mouth to feed at home. With each trip to the tank running him $90, he can’t get ahead, no matter how many hours he puts in on the road.

Enter a passenger (scene-stealing Adam Goldhammer) who reps a competing startup app, promising D (Nathanael Chadwick, The Last Porno Show) earnings of thousands a night driving for them. It doesn’t require a fancy car — just utmost discretion and following orders to a T, lest D lose $50 per missed command.

If you assume taking the job makes D complicit in criminal activity and abhorrent behavior, well, duh! And therein lies Self Driver’s fun, as D tools around town, running dubious errands and picking up questionable fares, all while Antonio Naranjo’s score nearly wraps tension into White Lotus-tight knots. With the script’s one-crazy-night setup, writer/director (and editor) Michael Pierro grants his first feature a significant After Hours vibe, right down to its Möbius-strip end, although leans more into the lane of danger.

If only D were a quarter as likable as Paul Hackett. Sure, Griffin Dunne’s character in that Martin Scorsese black comedy lived in a buffer bubble of yuppiedom, but he wasn’t an asshole by trade. That’s my one nagging issue with the otherwise impressive Self Driver: Its protagonist is a full-time asshole. D’s rude to customers; his car is a pig sty; he urinates in public — none of which endear us to him the way abject poverty alone would.

Still, as D, Chadwick is well-cast. So are all the actors portraying riders of varying sanity and sobriety who flit in and out of his backseat until day finally breaks. Among them, Christian Aldo and Catt Filippov (both Last Porno vets) stand out as, respectively, a high-strung drug dealer and an enigmatic young woman bearing angel wings. I know, I know: That last one seems like a metaphor so on-the-nose, you can taste the Afrin drip. But before that can happen, Pierro’s indie takes a major turn you won’t anticipate. —Rod Lott

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The Sacred Spirit (2021)

Between the unsettling visions of the great beyond and an unwavering devotion to depicting a dark, sad reality, The Sacred Spirit rides the line between unexplained phenomena and drastic sobriety. And not in the way you might think.

You see, Spirit is about the innocent layers of a fractured soul. Eventually, it gets to a rotten core that slashes and burns everything around. It’s a reverse ugly-duckling scenario that still shakes me after the credits rolled.

José (Nacho Fernández) is a simple guy who works at a small-time tapas bar with quirky regulars and personable clientele. After closing, he’s part of a UFO cult that believes spacemen are coming back — and very soon. While the community wrestles with finding a missing girl — José’s niece, mind you — he comes off like a somewhat dopey, but harmless crackpot.

Meanwhile, lamenting the loss of their beloved leader, the cult members trek to his grave on the town outskirts to pay their respects. There, José drops a child’s pink-bunny backpack into the river. While the police investigate, José takes his other niece, the missing girl’s twin, to an “astral plane” discussion, telling her stories about a UFO coming to take them away that evening to live in paradise.

It doesn’t happen, but what does is far worse.

At first, Spirit is about crazy UFO culture and their followers’ belief systems. But as the New Age group Sacred Spirit’s “Yeha-Noha” plays over the end credits, it’s methodically razed the whole area to ash in beauty and shame, purification and purification.

Chema García Ibarra’s bait-and-switch direction is close to the crazed realism depicted in Jose’s UFO books, with the Sphinx and other Egypt-centric items he imagines in his life. If you go into this wanting a flying saucer debate among the backroom crazies, sorry, it’s not here. The Sacred Spirit is a calm, almost mumblecore depiction of analog beliefs in a broken world. —Louis Fowler

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Fear Is the Key (1972)

Vanishing Point’s Barry Newman takes the wheel of Fear Is the Key as John Talbot, a man who has nothing to lose — because he already has. In the first scene, he’s mid-conversation via radio with his wife when her plane is shot down, killing her.

Cut to: rural Louisiana. Now, Talbot gives zero fucks. While driving through the Deep South, he runs afoul of the law and ends up hauled to court. So he simply shoots his way out, taking an unlucky spectator named Sarah (Suzy Kendall, Circus of Fear) hostage.

Stealing a ’72 Ford Gran Torino, Talbot kicks off an extraordinary car chase with a brassy Roy Budd score. Seriously, this sequence is an all-time great, nipping at the trunks of Bullitt and The French Connection. It’s great distraction to keep viewers from realizing screenwriter Robert Carrington (Wait Until Dark) lets a whole act pass before letting us know what the heck Talbot’s even doing in Louisiana, much less start plotting.  

Sarah’s the daughter of an oil baron (Ray McAnally, Taffin) with several heavies on his payroll. Rather than send Talbot six feet under for kidnapping, they enlist him on a deep-sea salvage mission for millions in jewels. The scene when Talbot glimpses their target on the ocean floor is a thing of beauty — so breathtaking, it’s odd director Michael Tuchner (1971’s Villain) soon found himself toiling for the tube.

Something of an outlier for an adaptation of Alistair MacLean, the novelist responsible for every existing movie with “Navarone” in its title, Fear Is the Key hums with quality. Although Newman is not the “SUPER COOL DANGER-FREAK” as the Australian one-sheet proclaimed, he’s a reliable presence and — necessary for highly flawed heroes — affable. At his side, Kendall possesses great beauty, great lungs for screaming and an awful Louisiana accent.

John Vernon (Dirty Harry), Dolph Sweet (Brian De Palma’s Sisters) and, in his first film, that Sexy Beast Ben Kingsley nail their supporting roles. Apropos of nothing but Key’s overall quality, their characters bear incredible names: respectively, Vyland, Jablonksi and Royale — no cheese whatsoever.

An unheralded crime film awaiting discovery, Fear Is the Key transitions baby-butt smoothly from action to adventure while staying sublime all the while. —Rod Lott

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How to Get Ahead in Advertising (1989)

In the early ’90s on the most basic of cable, I saw Withnail and I, Bruce Robinson’s acerbic dramatic comedy that’s basically an acid-laced coming-of-age tale, except the protagonists are failed actors already-of-age in their late 20s.

Along with The Young Ones, Time Bandits and a supple diet of Benny Hill, this film gave me the basic groundings of British comedy, one I fell in love with over its “God Save the Queen” pathos that embrace the rigid anarchy of the UK punk subculture I wished I were a part of.

Growing up in Blooming Grove, Texas, I reached for the entertainment section of each Friday’s Dallas Morning News. It ran small ads for an indie, esoteric and outré theater called the Inwood, which showed titles so outrageous and provocative, it made me wish I had cool parents with a sense of pop culture but, you know, whatever. The ad for How to Get Ahead in Advertising always stuck with me, wondering about this monstrous movie from the guy behind Withnail.

This week, these two life-influencing greats came together in a way I wasn’t expecting: I finally got to screen Advertising. It’s a semi-monstrous monster film — as much as brash, witty and brazen indies could be then — about slick ad exec Bagley (Richard E. Grant) and the somewhat sleazy ways his marketing campaigns become successful.

He’s working on a pimple cream campaign with no luck — until a small pimple fortuitously grows on his neck. The zit develops eyes, a mouth and, eventually, a speaking voice. Of course, it makes Bagley’s life hell. Like David Cronenberg’s The Brood, but far more stiff-upper-lipped with a starched white collar, the living canker sore engulfs Bagley and his whole persona. “Boils,” he says, “are beautiful.”

Like many things in 1980s Britain, How to Get Ahead is a rancid, devious take on the politics of Thatcher (which I was far removed from then and now) and the dark policies of coke-sniffing, ink-suffering capitalism that smothers every man, woman and child in a drowning pool of commercials.

Grant is more nuanced than usual as the staid Bagley, then becomes more manic as the film goes on, looking like Rik Mayall’s older, calmer brother. With machine-gun barbs, his performance is so cutting, it’s better than Withnail and I. I’m glad I finally saw it.

Today, the Inwood is still a movie theater, but mainstream, with screenings of A Minecraft Movie and other non-indie films. I guess How to Get Ahead in Advertising‘s selling-out prophecy came through in spades. That, I can truly say, is the worst. —Louis Fowler

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Communion (1989)

As played by Christopher Walken in the film Communion, with nary a Jesus cracker in sight, Whitley Strieber tries to write the Great American Novel. Because Strieber is a real-life author of The Wolfen and The Hunger, we know he won’t. But he does write the book Communion, the work of nonfiction — 😉 😉 — that ultimately will take his career to the stars.

Why? The answer’s in the butt, Bob. No Walken film is more Walken, for reasons that shall become apparent.

At a post-Christmas weekend visit to the family cabin from their NYC apartment, Whitley endures a sweaty nightmare of being visited by gray-skinned, big-eyed aliens from outer space. After returning home, his wife (Lindsay Crouse, The Arrival) notices he’s just not himself anymore — and for good reason, which surfaces under hypnosis by Misery’s Frances Sternhagen: That was no dream. And following that logic, that means the anal probe … gulp!

This causes a fissure in his rectum marriage, which may be for the best, considering the missus has a fashion sense I’d dub “Annie Hall meets Carmen Sandiego.”

The first glimpse we’re afforded of the alien is merely partial — and wholly terrifying. This bodes well for Communion. But as Whitley’s obsessions and breakdowns increasingly unhinge him from reality, Walken goes full Walken, and so does the movie! From the director’s chair, Philippe Mora (Howling II and III) approaches lucidity more liberally than his star tackles diction.

I don’t quite know how to convey the odd-as-a-$3-bill nature of Whitley’s experiences on the aliens’ ship. He parties with them in a pilgrim hat. They hang in a steam room. He high-fives an E.T. and then dances. I realize these sound like scenes from a stoner comedy where Seth Rogen might blow aliens’ minds with bong-hit lessons and, in exchange, they infuse his with, like, algebra and shit.

Seriously, these too-close encounters of the WTF kind feel as though Mora and Strieber (who adapted his own bestseller for the screenplay) are just fucking with us to see if we’re willing to swallow. I am not.

In fact, I’d steal Whitley’s ominous threat to public transit riders — “Let me tell you, you folks are in for a big surprise, one very big surprise” — and throw it right back at this maladroit movie, aiming to knock that goddamn pilgrim hat into a galaxy far, far away. That’s more action than the third section gives, and still no Jesus crackers. —Rod Lott

Get it at Amazon.

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