If you think watching people play Dungeons & Dragons is boring, Knight Chills would like to have a word with you. Now, you’re correct and the shot-on-video movie is dead wrong, but Knight Chills wants a word nonetheless. It’s either not listening or doesn’t care an iota. You’re going to see some serious, no-move-spared RPGing, dammit.
Once a week, a handful of students meet for D&Ding in the basement of a teacher (Tim Jeffrey) who doubles as dungeon master: “The scent of nutmeg is overwhelming.” John (Michael Rene Walton, Superfights) is one of the regulars, despite being openly ridiculed and bullied by the others. John’s dogged attendance might have something to do with fellow gamer Brooke (Laura Tidwell) looking like a layaway-plan Jessica Chastain.
After Brooke soundly rejects John’s date offer in front of the others, he dons the full regalia — from armor to sword — of his gaming character, Sir Kallio, and embarks on a killing spree of vengeance. Even with “Sir Kallio” being a name one shouldn’t speak in the presence of others, Knight Chills’ premise is terrific for a slasher movie, yet near-instantly squandered by first-/last-time director Katherine Hicks.
Although each kill is different, milady, that variety across homicides isn’t enough to offset the mind-numbing scenes of seemingly eternal game play. The scent of something is overwhelming, all right, but it sure ain’t nutmeg. Zero hit points. —Rod Lott