In the annals of Clive Barker cinematic adaptations, The Midnight Meat Train is a redheaded stepchild, often put to the side and ignored. And it’s a damned shame; while it never achieves the classic status of Hellraiser, Meat Train has a lot going on beneath its engine.
Barker’s never been a “buxom co-ed battles hockey-masked lunatic” sort of writer. Instead, his tales revel in thematic subtext: Hellraiser concerns itself with the BDSM subculture; Candyman, the importance of folk tales to society; Nightbreed, a classism/racism allegory; Lord of Illusions, the fragility of reality. Even the horrid Rawhead Rex contemplates the nurturing qualities of mothers vs. the stereotypical aggressive male. So, too, Meat Train is less a “serial killer run amok” gorefest and more about the mythological heart of New York City, a heart that requires much blood to continue pumping.
But don’t fret, gorehounds; you won’t be left wanting.
Bradley Cooper (The Hangover trilogy) goes gritty as Leon, a photographer trying to capture the true black heart of NYC. He becomes obsessed with the nocturnal wanderings of Mahogany, a strange, silent behemoth played by former UK footballer Vinnie Jones (The Condemned). Following the mute leviathan into the subways, Leon discovers exactly where most of the city’s missing persons end up; in an abandoned subway station, slaughtered by Mahogany to be prepared and fed to what appears to be relatives of The Descent’s cave dwellers.
The performances surpass those of more standard horror fare. Cooper goes darker than his current status as Hollywood golden boy will ever allow again; Jones proves that, like fellow hulk Arnold Schwarzenegger, he’s far more effective when he doesn’t open his mouth; and the eternally underutilized Leslie Bibb (Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby) brings nice heft and grit to her role as Leon’s concerned fiancé. The spectacularly bloody proceedings (boy howdy, are they bloody) are unsettlingly orchestrated by director Ryûhei Kitamura (Versus), although an overuse of CGI bloodletting takes a viewer out of the story once too often. And if the ultimate ending doesn’t resonate quite like that of the eponymous Barker short story (one of the finest horror tales of the 20th century), there are moments of true dread scattered throughout.
And, yes, plenty of practical gore. Sure, the characters’ actions stretch disbelief to the breaking point, but it’s all presented with a heady seriousness, with nary an audience-friendly wink to be found. It’s unsteady on its feet, but I’ll take The Midnight Meat Train over the “safe” horror of Ouija or As Above, So Below any day. —Corey Redekop